Thursday, December 1, 2011

This devotional was in my inbox this morning.  After last night, this was exactly what God knew I needed to read.

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth.” John 1:1, 14 (ESV)
How are you? I’m posed this question many times a day, but haven’t delved into the truth lately. ‘Cause truth is, there are only a few I want to be that honest with. And those I generally share the depths with are wading through extenuating circumstances. Filled to capacity, they’ve needed a place to pour out.
Cupped hands catch their words, worries, wants. Until my hands are heavy.
I’m weary from taking in and not pouring myself out in return. I understand; they don’t have it to give right now. Yet, hour upon hour of listening… I’m not sure I have it to give right now either.
Irony is, my very name means “Listener.” Double irony is my life verse from last year: “Whoever refreshes others will be refreshed” (Proverbs 11:25b NIV). But I can not take any more words into a soul cram-full. And I can not pour out refreshment that is not there.
I’m completely full, yet totally empty.
And so I selfishly check out in the name of self-preservation; retreat into myself, away from their words weighted with pain and trouble and questions. Distance my being from all words. Until the Word beckons me with cupped hands large enough to hold my needy soul, friend’s worn circumstances, the thin world.
I pour into the Word, a measureless crevice in which my words rest. He asks three words my parched soul thirsts for, “How are you?”
I’m weary. "I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10b (NIV)
I feel alone. “And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” Matthew 28:20b (NIV)
I can’t take much more. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28b (NIV)
I pour out, He pours in. An ebb and flow more natural than the ocean’s tides. My needy soul needs His words; needs Him: the Word.
Community is God-given. But friend’s and family’s ability to be leaned on will ebb and flow. Hence our soul’s deepest need: friendship with the Lord. {Inhale deeply that delight: we’re friends with God.} Friends with the unchanging nature of theWord, Jesus.
Will you take His cupped hand, reaching out to hold you, your cares, your friends and family members? Take His hand and take a walk through Him, the Word. Pour your truthful answers into Him and pour yourself into the fields of Scripture. Refreshment awaits. He’s asking, “How are you?”
Dear Lord, thank You for never changing. Thank You for listening and hearing. Thank You for Your faithful friendship. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.


Tember said...

What an amazing devotional and so timely...I'm sorry for your pain and the sacrifices you and your family are making. You are an amazing woman of God, beautiful and gracious in all you do...I love you!

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